Live EventThe Rocket Men Are Back Playing In The Online CasinoWatch Now
Live EventNew York and Indiana Fans Face Off, NY Leads 1-0 - Live from the Barstool Gambling CaveWatch Now
NEW: Bussin' With the Boys Dad Merch CollectionSHOP NOW

Advertisement

Zendaya Dating Tom Holland Could Not Make It Any More Of A 5'8 Boy Summer

So I saw this viral tweet last week on 4th of July & it brought joy to not only myself, but I'm sure to all the other 5'8 kings that reside on this beautiful planet we call Earth. A lot of times it's not easy for us short guys as, if were being frank, it seems like most of the ladies out there like taller fellas. Not to mention the possibility of being a professional athlete is very slim from the jump unless we wanna be 5'8 400lb shotput throwers which I guess could THEORETICALLY HAPPEN. One of our few pros is no worries about leg room on airplanes, but TRUST ME we'd trade that in for a couple inches for a couple inches in a heartbeat.

Yet none of that matters now. It's all out the window. Zendaya has declared it 5'8 boy summer by dating one of our most profound members in the 5'8 club in Tom Holland. He's fucking Spider-Man, ever heard of him? And as if your friendly neighborhood superhero isn't enough you know who else I JUST found out was also in the 5'8 frat? Frank. Goddamn. Sinatra.

Advertisement

I happened to be pregaming at a buddy's apartment the other night where he had a huge wall mural of Frank's mugshot. As I was analyzing the glorious photo I realized the arrest report was below it out only to see 5'8 jump RIGHT OUT at me. I thought could it be? Could it be one of the closest men to God in recent memory was a 5'8 boy? Low and behold...it was TRUE. 

Let's have a 5'8 boy Summer, everyone.