Tiffany Haddish Told Nicolas Cage He Was Responsible for Her First Orgasm

Like every sentient being, I struggle with the nature of the phenomenon we call Nicolas Cage. Not merely because I can't decide if he's a terrible actor or a genius. We all struggle with that. The bigger issue with Cage is trying to figure out exactly to what extent he's fucking with us. He's constantly taking his audience on a journey deep into Bananaland, and we can never tell if he's serious or just seeing how far he can push the envelope before Hollywood stops the paychecks. 

I mean, just consider Face/Off. A movie where he and John Travolta switch bodies, not just through some magic spell like Freaky Friday or something, but by actually switching their surgically removed faces. It's patently absurd. The idea probably never should have made it past the first draft of the script. And you can't imagine more than maybe three or four other actors than these two even attempting it. And yet it not only worked, it became a mainstream hit, grossing a quarter of a billion worldwide in 1997 dollars. 

And Face/Off doesn't even crack Cage's personal Top 20 most bonkers films. For that I'll nominate the blood-soaked, fever dream splatterfest that is Mandy. But then he's note perfect in movies like National Treasure, Kick-Ass and Into the Spider-Verse. So yes, his an enigma wrapped inside a mystery and locked inside a Cage. Yet there's no denying he has a lot of appeal for a wide audience. 

Even, it seems, sex appeal. Go figure:

Source -  Tiffany Haddish came clean to actor Nicolas Cage about having her first orgasm while watching him terrorize John Travolta in the 1997 action flick, “Face/Off.”

“It was my first big O,” Haddish, 41, said to NPR Tuesday.

The cheeky comedienne — who stars opposite Cage, 57, in the forthcoming feature “The Unbearable Weight of Massive Talent” — said she felt compelled to tell the Oscar winner about her euphoric experience while on set in 2020. ...

Haddish ultimately opted to spill the beans when she realized her awkward vibes were beginning to tarnish her favor with the “National Treasure” hero.

“You could tell he was getting irritated, and I was like, ‘Look, I’m really intimidated by you, and I need to tell you something,’ ” she said. ” ‘I have to tell you this story, man, and once I tell you this story, it’ll be fine.’ “

Haddish explained that at 17 years old, she and her then-boyfriend went to a nearly empty movie theater to see “Face/Off.”

During the semiprivate viewing, she began making out with her date and their lusty lovemaking brought Haddish to climax. And when she opened her eyes, Cage’s steely stare was the first thing she saw beaming from the big screen. 

“As I was achieving a momentous moment that I had never experienced in my life,” Haddish said, laughing. “I open my eyes, and the eyes of Nicolas Cage are looking into my eyes super big.” ...

Luckily, Haddish’s orgasmic admission broke the ice between her and Cage, who she claims he “laughed super hard” at the titillating tale.

I'm going work really hard to be careful with my words here because we are talking about a 17-year-old. And even though it's a 17-year-old from 24 years ago, the internet does no longer recognizes the Statute of Limitations on certain offenses. The last thing I need is an court-ordered ankle bracelet in shorts weather. 

All I'll say is that had to have been a special moment between these two. I must be a nice bonding experience between co-workers to know that one was present for the other's first O-Face. Even if it was just an image projected onto a screen. And speaking as someone in Cage's age demo, I can assure you it's not the worst thing for a man's ego to hear that from a woman. I say "assure" even though it's a total guess on my part, having never heard any woman say that looking at me got them to the mountaintop. But if one did, I'd be over the moon about it. 

As a matter of fact, if any of you ladies have ever had the Tiffany Haddish Face/Off experience while reading one of my posts, by all means share that in the comments section. If I can't measure up to Nicolas Cage's success as our most bizarre film star, I'd at least like to know I can match him womangasm-for-womangasm. 

Anyway, even as a high schooler, Tiffany realized what we all know now. No pun intended, Nicolas Cage is a true national treasure.