Live EventBarstool Sports Picks Central | Monday, June 14th, 2021Watch Now

BREAKING NEWS: I’m Officially a Kangol Guy

Unfortunately, I wasn’t blessed with many spectacular qualities in my life. I was never the smartest, best looking, funniest or most athletic. However I was blessed with one quality that you can’t teach and can’t improve on, you either have it or you don’t. I am one hell of a versatile dresser. I have the ability to pull off any kind of look. I can switch up looks on a moments notice and rock the fuck out of it. I can dressy preppy, urban, dress up or dress down and I can pull it off. This also infiltrates its way to my head. I can wear ANY hat. Literally any hat. Baseball hats, fitteds, snapbacks, cowboy hats and most importantly for this sake of this blog, I can rock the hell out of a kangol. I know some hardos are gonna comment “Kangols a brand not a style of hat!!!!” For those people I only have one thing to say. I don’t care what you think so shut the fuck up you big dumb idiot. This is my blog and my words and I call it a kangol so that’s what it is. If you don’t like it it’s already too late because if you‘re reading this I already have your click so I could care less what you think. It’s like buying someone’s CD and saying it sucks. Don’t care, you‘ve already put the money in my pocket, you simpleton. 

Back to the topic at hand, I look so fucking good in this Kangol. My guy Rico bought me one this morning on his way into the office so we could pay our respects to the legend Tommy Cheeseballs on Picks Central this morning and I’ve never felt more at home than when my big ass pear shaped head fit perfectly snug in this lovely kangol hat. Don’t take it from me, take it from the people.

(Need a Knicks playoff win tonight, but if I can pull it off with that shirt I can pull it off with anything)

When it comes to Kangols it’s pretty simple. You either have it or you don’t. Take one look at that picture and it’s abundantly clear that I have it. This hat rest’s beautifully on my head. I might fuck around and wear one the rest of summer. Shit, the rest of my life if I feel like it. The part I’ve left out so far is that I’ve always known I was a kangol guy. I was rocking Kangols in college unironically all the way back in 2016 and the people LOVED it. 

That picture was taken on New Years Eve 2015 turning 2016. By the egregious amount of alcoholic beverages it seems like I had already consumed at the time of this photo, I’m just gonna assume the clock had struck midnight, but who knows. The only thing I do know is I crushed that kangol look over 5 years ago the same way I did today….. FLAWLESSLY. 

Shoutout Tommy Cheeseballs the GOAT. If it wasn’t for him there’s a chance I would have never found this fantastic kangol look for myself. I probably would have regardless, but ya never know there’s a chance. Catch me down the Jersey shore this summer raging my big fat face off in an array of fire ass Kangols, the way the King of Seaside Heights, Tommy Cheeseballs, would have wanted.