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A Rotisserie Chicken Might Be The Perfect Meal

-I don’t like when a website for a relatively unimportant place requires you to use a capital letter, number, and special character in a password. For a bank account? Sure, makes sense. But for like fucking Staples Rewards? Everyone in the world could hack into my Staples account and I don’t think it would impact my life at all. 

-It’s hard to both eat healthy and save money on food. I usually find myself choosing between one or the other. Do I get a cheap meal from Wendys? Or do I have to spend a bunch of money on salmon and vegetables. I find that a rotisserie chicken is the best mix of pretty cheap and pretty healthy.

-I love texting someone in the same room as me and then watching them like a hawk to see their reaction. It makes me feel good if they laugh or smile. If they don’t? I wish death upon them. 

-I hate how different apps on a smart TV require different volumes. Netflix I can keep around 18. HBO I go up to like 30. TruTV when I’m watching Impractical Jokers I need to blast to like 60. Eventually you learn them and remember, but I do wish they were all more consistent. 

-I’m incapable of having a hidden talent. Any time I’m mildly good at something, I tell everyone I know, post about it, talk about it incessantly. So while I might get a new talent, but it certainly won’t be hidden. 

-It’s weird how we’re so used to thinking about there being a King and a Queen, and they’re married and rule the country, but in the English monarchy, there’s never a King and a Queen at the same time. It’s one or the other. They should fix that. 

-If someone sends a funny text and you want to do the laugh reaction to it, but there’s a typo, should you react to the original message, or to the typo correction? I wish that we could agree on this as a society because I hate missing out on laughs due to a typo. 

Thank you for your time.