The Giants Have Signed Kelvin Benjamin...As A Tight End

GETTLEFINGER STRIKES!!!

Look at Trader Dave changing hats, becoming Signer Dave, and making the biggest splash on the offseason! The internet is abuzz with Kelvin Benjamin talk this morning.

If Urban Meyer can bring back his old QB1 from Florida at Tight End, Dave Gettleman can definitely bring back his old WR1 from Carolina at Tight End. 

Some people may have noticed that I just updated my blog about Benjamin working out with the Giants on Friday, which some would call a lazy move. But I would never use the L word about another person. Lest we forget that once upon a time when the internet was a much meaner place, Kelvin Benjamin caught a lot of heat once upon a time for being "lazy" simply because he was a big man that got a little bit bigger in a sport full of big men.

Were his routes the crispest in the world? Perhaps not...

And Booger may or may not have called this exact scenario playing out years ago.

I thought units respect units smh

But we all know Dave Gettleman has always liked his Mollies to have some Hog in them, so he brought in Kelvin to try out at tight end. On National Biscuit Day no less! 

h/t Jake

Kelvin clearly impressed the last couple of days by showing he can catch and take an absolute licking from some mats and keep on ticking.

I liked the idea of bringing in Benjamin at tight end even before I saw that clip because he clearly has talent, got a taste of life without an NFL paycheck, and the puff pieces write themselves. But I love move after seeing Benjamin looking like the fucking Juggernaut with a chonky number like 85 on him.

There was nooooo way Kelvin was going to make the Giants as a receiver considering their depth chart is crazy deep with Golladay, Shep, Slayton, and Toney all getting the lion's share of targets with John Ross, Dante Pettis, CJ Board and Austin Mack all guys that can chip in. And the Tight End position is tough to break into considering Evan Engram is a """Pro Bowler"""", Kyle Rudolph is a man mountain that never drops passes, I was ready to christen Kaden Smith as the Giants Tight End of the Future based off his 2nd half of 2019, and Levine Toilolo restructured his deal to get some guaranteed money.

But anytime you can get a guy that put up 1000 yards and 9 TDs as a rookie, you sign him then edit his position like it's Madden later. I would love to tell you how much Kelvin's rating went up by switching him to TE in last year's Madden, but he isn't in the game considering he hasn't played in the NFL since 2018(!!!).

That doesn't matter though because you can't tell me that Coach Judge didn't pick up a thing or two from Bill Belichick during his years in New England. Signing a guy with hands of a receiver, the position of a tight end, and the body of an O-Lineman will cause absolute chaos once he reports eligible during the biggest play of the game. Even Jason Garrett can't fuck that up! Just keep Benjamin out of the game between the 20s then cause absolute chaos by running routes with him, Rudolph, Golladay, Saquon, Shep, Slayton, and Toney (along with Evan Engram as long as he has no chance to bat the ball directly to the opposing team).

Danny Dimes just keeps getting weapons of all shapes and sizes to the point they are trying to slow out his fastest weapons by giving them slow numbers and taking off a shoe. 

Pray for the NFC.