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Jeff Bezos Will Be Able To Review All Of The Amazon Workers Complaints On His New $500 Million Yacht

Put that in your pipe and smoke it, Amazon workers. While the entire internet is complaining that his employees can't take bathroom breaks and have to piss in bottles, Jeff Bezos says, "I'll get right on that one" right after I go buy this $500 million yacht. They're saying this 127 meter yacht is so big that it needs a "support yacht" next to it for the helipad he's putting on it. I'm not entirely sure what that means, but I agree that no boat is complete without a helipad. To the haters, what do you guys think this is, a paddle boat? The man wants to live in luxury a little bit. Take his new girlfriend out on the water. Could you imagine trying to court a female on a $250,000,000 yacht? Good luck! 

**For our number crunchers out there, Jeff Bezos is paying 2x as much for this boat as he did for the Washington Post.

Giphy Images.

I love everything about this. I know that some people (basically the entire internet) is whining and crying about how the pandemic has ruined so many business and lives, while it has only made people like Jeff Bezos richer and richer. To be clear, "rich" is no longer the appropriate term to describe our guy. Lump him into a different category. Because I'm not sure there's a word in the English language to correctly explain how much money his $191 billion net worth truly is. But either way, I am simply envious of people that have this much money. I don't know what the answer is, but it's just crazy to think that is Bezos wanted to be a charitable lad when he croaks, 191,000 people could become millionaires when the will is done. Wouldn't that be fun? And I think it'd be a good way to keep the haters off his back for the rest of his life span. Simply tweet "When I die, I will make 190,000 people in this country a millionaire over night. We will have a lottery, and the only criteria is you can never have tweeted negative things about me, starting now." His timeline would clear up in a HURRY! And that would have to be a welcomed change for him. Because I'm not sure he has any other worries in the world. Well, that and the yacht market being so hot right now….

The secretive boat-building industry that is thriving like never before — thanks largely to the COVID-19 pandemic making many of the world’s wealthiest even richer

Recent transactions have been “record-breaking” — and “the second-hand market is absolutely red hot.”

“It’s impossible to get a slot in a new-build yard,” Tucker said. “They’re totally booked.”

Ugh, it appears the hard times have fallen upon the wealthy as well during this pandemic. Sure, some of us commoners may have lost our jobs, but the second-hand yacht market is smoldering hot! And good luck trying to find a slot in the new-build yard. It's all booked up! We're worried about the housing market, they're worried about the yacht market. We're not so different after all, folks.