Cue the Duckboats | Championship Collection for Banner 18SHOP NOW

Advertisement

Stop Making Fake Dating App Profiles For Bill Gates, It's Too Soon, We Are Still Healing

So far this is the only one I've seen, and I better not see any more. When I read the news of Bill and Melinda Gates' divorce, I was sipping on a glass of Stag's Leap Cask 23 Cabernet Sauvignon in Napa. I announced it to the room, and we all reacted as if someone had died.  They may be alive, but something DID die yesterday.

Love died.

A 27 year marriage, a partnership that changes the world on a daily basis (computers, ever heard of them?) gone in the blink of an eye. The saddest part about the announcement was the CLEAR separation between Bill and Melinda.

"Melinda Gates and Bill Gates." No longer Melinda and Bill Gates, together. Just a dagger right to the heart.

And we have assholes who have the AUDACITY to put Bill on Tinder??? Making loose dick/vaccine jokes?? NO SIR. SHOW SOME RESPECT! HOW DARE YOU! Bill needs time to grieve!!! They both do! Imagine Bill Gates rebounding with some bitch 10 years younger who's definitely only going to be using him for his money? Plus, we all know Bill would be on Raya (even though Raya kind of sucks. Although I guess Ben Affleck is on Raya so maybe I should re-download it.) I DIGRESS! Quit forcing this man to move on too fast. That's how you end up in a controlling relationship that you put yourself on autopilot for, blink your eyes, 2 years goes by, and you're miserable and missing your ex wife.