Advertisement

After Taking One Good Look At McConaughey, There's No Way Austin FC Loses A Single Game This MLS Season

I mean…how? How in the actual hell can one dude be so damn cool? 

You've got all these teams in the MLS preparing for the upcoming 2021 season. Training camp, exhibition matches, the usual. I bet McConaughey just had his boys go out to the desert, smoke a bunch of peyote, unlock their brain to its ultimate potential and come back with a newfound connection to the universe for training camp. How can any other team in the league compete with that? And don't even get me started when it comes to free agency in the league. Hell, don't even get me started when it comes to free agency around the entire sport of futbol. If I'm Leo Messi or Cristiano Ronaldo, McConaughey is the dude I want to play the rest of my career for. 

Oh and as if having McConaughey as the co-owner/MoC wasn't enough of a draw to get the best players in the world dying to suit up for Austin FC, they'll also have Valentina's Tex Mex BBQ available at their stadium. 

For those of you who are unfamiliar with Valentina's…well I just hope you weren't hungry. Because there's nothing within your proximity right now that can compete with this.  

Advertisement

One of the most badass joints in America. Austin FC should have a sold out crowd every game just for the food itself. 

So yeah. If I were you, I'd be tossing a nice little future bet on Austin FC winning the MLS Cup this season because I see zero losses in their future. Heard. 

@JordieBarstool