JJ Watt Tweets Out a Random Fact About Cell Biology and the Conspiracy Theories are Bananas

Mark Zaleski. Shutterstock Images.

I've always had the impression that free agency, in any sport, is not for everyone. That for every guy who relishes the chance to have some control over their career (often for the first time), there's another guy who dreads the uncertainty of not knowing where they'll end up and what kind of money they'll make. It's human nature. Some people are natural risk takers and some crave security. 

But if there's anyone who you know is going to thrive during the process, you just know it's going to be JJ Watt. First because this was all his idea. If he wanted certainty, he'd still be watching Jack Easterby destroy the Texans from within. Second, in case you haven't picked up on this during 10 years of him taking off his helmet and demonstrably emoting for the TV cameras like a silent movie star, he kind of enjoys attention. And when you're in the Top 20 of Pro Football Focus' free agents list, attention will not be hard to come by. 

Which brings us to this: 

A cryptic, random, six word Tweet that reads like a multiple choice question I probably got wrong in Introduction to Biology in middle school, and:

In a matter of hours it's north of 107,000 likes and climbing. 

And given that this is JJ Watt and everyone could use a three time DPOTY with 100 career sacks, I'm here for the insane conspiracy theories about what it all means. 

Suffice to say, no one is assuming that Watt has a sudden interest in cellular microbiology. That now that he's doesn't have a playbook to study, he's cracking open those textbooks he forgot to return to the bookstore at Wisconsin and is brushing up on his endosymbiotic and autogenous hypotheses of mitochondrion origin. And that he'll be starting a Twitter thread about his research into phospholipid transfers among these crafty little dynamic organelles. 

No, according the conspiracy buffs, he's tipping us off as to his decision. And the theories are extraordinary.

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Fricking genius. Not the theories. I'm talking about Watt. This is so on brand for him, all you can do is admire it. He pulls what is essentially a Double Jeopardy answer out of his ass and social media erupts. Everyone becomes Nic Cage looking for slues to treasure maps hidden in the words. I don't know how exactly, but I feel like this is somehow going to get him another year and $17 million tacked onto the end of whatever deal he signs. Until then, he can live off the added attention everything he does in the next few months will bring. This is JJ Watt at his most JJ Wattiness.