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Is An On Air RoboMessage Followed By "Good Riddance" The Worst Way To Find Out You Lost Your Job In The History Of Civilization?

Picture this. You're working inside the building at a radio station, perhaps oblivious to what may be on the air at a particular time. It feels like any other day. Several days ago, your employer ran its annual hashtag campaign dedicated to raising money for mental health awareness (that also happens to include its corporate name). "Wow, it's nice our overlords are thinking about our well-being," you think to yourself. 

Suddenly, and without any sort of warning to anyone anywhere, your multi-billion company decides to play this over its airwaves:

But you were in the shitter for your morning deuce and didn't hear it. Suddenly, you get texts from friends.

"OMG! So sorry!!!"

"Here if you need me..."

"WTF?"

You immediately think somebody died because what else would it be? 20 minutes later, you go back to your cubefarm and people are crying and hurriedly putting their personal belongings into boxes.

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Then somebody plays you the above clip. You realize that a person didn't die but your job did. And that you had to find about losing your livelihood from a fucking robotized voice followed by that Green Day song that every high school plays at its year-end assembly accompanied by pictures from the previous four years. It actually makes it worse. No, not because you don't like Green Day or because the song has been played out for ages with this kind of shit. It's just a brutal, heaping, completely unnecessary tablespoon of salt on your newly hacked and gushing jugular vein. I mean, they had you at "Goodbye". The cruel irony on top was just borderline sadism. 

Somehow, I've only been fired once in my life, from a bartending gig in downtown Boston (the work/study thing was technically a "relocation"). But I was at least told to my face by the manager (the owner was too much of a coward). I can't imagine getting shitcanned in the manner described above and not snapping on somebody, especially knowing that net earnings were up yet again.

No inkling. Just snuffed out via a poor K.I.T.T. impression. Then being told "get your shit and screw within a half-hour". Just horseshit corporate pussies like the kind that George Clooney worked for in UP IN THE AIR. Except worse. Because they at least hired actual people to fire you.

If Bell is cutting sports radio in all over Canada, then it must have a real money-maker lined up to replace it.

Giphy Images.

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On this week's Spittin' Chiclets, we didn't kick off the news with a typical hockey story or even sports story. Instead, we talked about this situation above because it's so shitty for those involved. We know that people are gonna lose their jobs whether because of pandemic reasons or U.S.-based streamers or because the owner fucking feels like it. But there's a right way to do it and a horrifically wrong way. Bell took the later.

But don't fret. We jumped into pucks right after and broke down the Laine shit, Hextall/Burkie to Pitt, the Bs/Rags playoff-like game, and everything else that happened in the last week of hockey.

Take a listen.