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Karen gets BUSTED!

First off, I am not a huge fan of the term "Karen" because I know quite a few Karens and they are all lovely... Karen Gillan for example... 

BUT I still used the name… along with all of its negative connotations… in the title of this blog just for effect.

Secondly, I live in a mid-to-upper class town in Bergen County, New Jersey which I assume contains the exact same cast of characters as any other county in the state.  So when a friend sent me this article involving some parents from Middlesex County, I smiled with delight.

Now I know nothing about the validity or accuracy of this article except, even though it may not be the New York Times, nj.com is traditionally a trustworthy source for local news… It is one of the few news outlets I subscribe to.

I will give you a little background on why I have a horse in this race first and then I will summarize the article for those too lazy to read it themselves (although the title- "Parent rips district over all-remote school. Official fires back photos of her family sledding without masks." say it all.)

Here is my horse… I just mentioned above where I live.  

I have mentioned before that I have a smoking hot wife and 3 wonderfully expensive children.

I am mentioning now that we are driving each other fucking INSANE.

My oldest is a couple of years away from going to college, so in a subtle move to tell him and his kin that we do not want them living with us after their educational gravy train reaches its final destination, my wife and I decided to downsize our house.

We moved into a very comfortable-but-more-moderately-sized place closer to the local high school where all three of my children will eventually matriculate.

After they finish high school, we assume they will all go off to college and then all go off on their own.  Leaving my wife and me in a perfect sized house to retire in… Drinking wine every morning and destroying each other's aging genitals every night while leaving the bedroom door wiiiiiide open for the first time in decades.

Giphy Images.

However, as soon as we moved into our new crib, a pandemic hit, and the five of us (plus one dog) were then thrown into a quarantine situation in a home that is considerably smaller than the one we were in just weeks before COVID 19 became a 'thing'.

To throw another cinder block onto a sinking ship, I decided to buy the family ANOTHER dog just a few short months ago and coming from a 49-year-old man who has had dogs his whole life, this little bitch is officially the worst puppy I have ever encountered.

So tighter quarters… Quarantine conditions… Living out of boxes… And a faint smell of puppy excrement always wafting around in the background… That is our life.

Oh… And there is still 2 feet of fucking snow on the ground.

I am not complaining (yes I am) because I know there are millions of virus-related deaths worldwide, but I am telling you what my cross has been to bear just for some background.

Here's another bit of background… My town is filled with two types of people: Regular people and cunts.

And the distinction doesn't run along any racial line… or wealth line… or religious line… or gender line… No matter what color your skin, amount in your bank account, church you attend, or bathroom you use, ANYONE can be a cunt.

And the loudest of these creatures are a constant source of both frustration AND entertainment for everyone else.

This brings me back to the nj.com article where (and I am paraphrasing for the benefit of brevity) a woman from Middlesex County was persistently complaining to the school board about their inability to re-open schools for in-school learning.  

Like the rest of us, this woman was frustrated with having her kids home all the time and perhaps felt they were better served going back to school.

Unlike the rest of us this potential cunt nagged the school board to open back up its doors, arguing that as long as families and children remained masked and socially distant, their risks of transmitting a deadly virus is less than the reward of learning in a traditional brick-and-mortar environment.

And she's probably right… My 3 are all thriving with the on-line or hybrid models, but I think they are also being severely hurt by not seeing kids their age on a regular basis.

However, this one woman was so annoying in her protests that the school board shot back saying that (again, I am paraphrasing) irresponsible and unmasked people who do not obey the rules of social distancing are the reason schools will remain closed.

And THEN they attached multiple pictures of this woman and a dozen or so other children and adults whooping it up on a sledding slope sometime last weekend… Nobody wearing a mask and everyone on top of each other.

.

.

------- BUSTED!!!!! -------

.

Giphy Images.

(Remember this psychopath caught dipping chicken into soda?)

Now, does this really make a difference in the long run?

Probably not.

And will the publishing of these pictures (every one of them with the faces blurred out) potentially present a cause for litigation from this sticky bitch?

Probably.

And are there pictures of me in less socially distant conditions floating around my own social media?

Absolutely.

But what I take away from this is that every cunt within reach of nj.com just received a warning shot across their bow, and hopefully that will provide at least a couple of minutes of silence for the rest of us as they all scrub their social media accounts for incriminating photos… And this reminds me of my favorite Karen scene of all time…

("It was all we had, Karen!")

Enjoy it now, regular people, because they will be back with a fucking vengeance.

Take a report.

-Large