So This Is What Happens When A Woman Climbs Over The Guardrail To Say Hi To The Two-Ton Polar Bear

A male polar bear named “Blinky” at the Alaska Zoo in Anchorage grabbed and badly injured an Australian tourist on Saturday. 29-year-old Sydney woman Kathryn Warburton had climbed over two protective fences in an attempt to take close-up photographs. Evidently, she encroached too close for Blinky’s liking. He leaned forward, grabbed Warburton with his paws and dragged her towards him. Warburton sustained a broken leg and bite wounds and has undergone surgery.

Blinky with the flawless victory on humanity. How those photographs turn out, Kathryn? Worth hopping the fence to play Ansel Adams with a disposal camera on a two-thousand pound beast that’s been locked up since birth? There’s a decent chance that woman who was yelling for a gun to magically appear would use it for purposes of natural selection. Gotta respect how the bear licks the blood off the bars, gloats with his trophy shoe and blatantly smiles in everyone’s faces. Don’t mess with Blinky.

Bears. Not even once.