NEW: Bussin' With the Boys Dad Merch CollectionSHOP NOW

Advertisement

52-Year Old Tony Hawk Can Still Do A 720 And Not Have All Of His Bones Turn Into Dust

Not to brag but I bought a new bed recently. Nothing fancy. It doesn't sit up with a remote or anything like that. Just a new, slightly firmer mattress. And boy oh boy has it put my back into SHAMBLES. Waking up has become my toughest test. The will power I show every single day to merely stand up and join society is second to none. Surely my body will adjust, or it wont, and I'll continue living with this newfound pain for the foreseeable future. Also of note, I'm 31-years old. The hardest thing I put my body through at 31 is... waking up.

Tony Hawk? Quite literally built different. 52-years old and still throwing his body around with zero care for his own physical wellbeing. I don't understand it. He has nothing to prove. Nothing. Still grinding away, failed attempt after failed attempt. Father Time sitting on the edge of the halfpipe mocking him with every plummet back to Earth. And then it all clicks and suddenly he's 21 all over again. I'm not even joking when I say this is the most impressive athletic achievement I've seen in some time. He's too old for all this. I feel like his mother, more and more worried every time he comes crashing down. Which, if we really wanna talk about it - is Tony Hawk better at falling than he is at skateboarding? I know he has 40+ year of experience but those falls were all far too gracious. The more I think about it, skating isn't one of the three best things Tony Hawk dominates. 

Advertisement

The Official List of Things Tony Hawk Is Great At:

  1. Making Video Games
  2. Tweeting
  3. Falling Down
  4. Skateboarding

PS - He landed that 720 for charity, because of course he did because Tony Hawk fucking rules. Knock skateboarding down to fifth on the list.