I'm not one to get political, but this is fucking hilarious. The image of Kera Birkeland standing there in a ref's shirt debating on why this bill should pass is hilarious. Not only that but people actually had to vote on this just makes me laugh at how stupid everything is. In case you aren't aware, we are in the middle of a Shaq vs Mitchell feud. It started with this weird ass statement by Shaq:
As I've said before it makes no sense. Mitchell has gotten better literally every year in the league. Donovan Mitchell has improved his scoring every single year in the league. He's improved his 3pt shooting every single year. Assists have gone up every single year. Fuck, he even averaged THIRTY SIX points per game in the playoffs last year. Not sure what more you want him to do. Defense? Yeah, he's been good there too from a win shares and steals perspective. He can do a little bit of everything which is dominated by scoring.
The feud escalated on Instagram without Mitchell. Shaq posted something about great guards as if we were talking about Mitchell in the same breath as Wade, LeBron, Kobe, etc. Then he slid into the DM's of some guy who photoshopped Mitchell dunking on him:
But back to the bill. I appreciate how Kera didn't hold back on Shaq at all:
25 even less accurate than his 50.4% playoff free-throw percentage (slightly worse than Donovan's
27 WHEREAS, the Jazz eliminated Shaq and the Los Angeles Lakers from the playoffs in
28 1997 (4-1) and 1998 (4-0);
29 WHEREAS, we are not talking about 2000, 2001, 2002, or 2006 right now, the years in
30 which Kobe Bryant's Los Angeles Lakers and Dwayne Wade's Miami Heat won championships
31 for Shaq;
32 WHEREAS, Kazaam has a 5% rating on rotten tomatoes;
33 WHEREAS, Shaq under-develops his hot takes almost as well as his 1990's "Shaq Fu"
34 video game;
Taking shots at Kazaam and Shaq Fu is perfect. If you're going to present a bill declaring Donovan Mitchell over Shaq, you better bring up every single thing you have. Also I'm pretty sure she brought in Charles Barkley to write the part about Kobe and Wade winning titles for Shaq. That's Chuck's go-to when they start arguing on Inside the NBA. I will note it was smart to leave out Blue Chips. Blue Chips is one of the greatest movies ever and I won't hear any slander about it.
I look forward to Shaq's response here. Also way better than the last time a government official tried to talk shit in Utah.