The Mets Have Fired Jared Porter After He Allegedly Sent 62 Straight Texts And Dick Pics To A Female Reporter

Cuncel da Porter! This seemed like the obvious move that had to be made ASAP once this story broke last night.

Advertisement

62. SIX TWO. With an unsolicited dick pic to top things off that feels like the creepier, modern version of the answering machine scene from Swingers. Coley hit the nail on the head in his blog as I was sleeping when the news broke. My reaction is what I imagine many Mets fans' reactions were like this morning.

It's real hard not to feel like this is back to the Old Mets right now even if there is a new owner, superstar shortstop, and feelings of optimism in Metsland. But Uncle Stevie passing the sentence and swinging the sword on Porter before 9 AM at least shows there is some accountability in Queens considering the Wilpons had Carlos Beltran dangling in the wind for days before deciding to fire their disgraced winter hire before Opening Day. 

Obviously there will be a We Gotta Believe to recap all this mumbo jumbo.