There's Nothing Like A Good Ol' Fashioned Donnybrook At a Florida Publix Deli

The deli at the grocery store can either be the best place on Earth or pure misery. All depends on how long you have to wait, if they give you the free sample slice, and if there’s a royal rumble taking place around you. There’s nothing worse than the deli worker who doesn’t cut off the free sample for you. And then you always nod your head like “yes, this slice will suffice” as if you would ever request them to slice the turkey differently. Now if I could add in a fist fight between two grown ass Florida men every time, I don’t think I would ever leave the grocery store. That was a hell of a bare knuckle brawl, the likes of which haven’t been seen since the white trash women and child got into it at Walmart. I need to know what started this. Did someone cut the line? Did someone snicker because one of the guys ordered some poor people shit like bologna? What more than likely happened was the deli worker cut too much, and then didn’t pick up the extra before weighing it and a guy just got mad and turned around and punched the other dude right in the face out of shear anger. That is the worst thing that can happen. You order a pound, they weigh out 1.3 pounds, and then make you pay for 1.3 pounds. No, cunt. You pick up that extra .3, print the sticker, then put the .3 back down on the scale and wrap it up for me. That’s the stuff deli legends are made of.

PS: He has a 9 and a half month pregnant wife? Did I hear that correctly? I guess he’s just getting his grocery store brawling out the way before she pops? Only thing that makes sense to me.