This is my life now I guess. Gone are the days of getting ready for meaningful January football games. Now my January enjoyment comes from the laughter of seeing other grown adults lose their collective shit over our beloved Steelers losing.
Holy shit. We lost to the Browns and now we're becoming them.
Nonetheless they are very funny. Let's start with a throwback to our last vomit inducing playoff loss at home in 2017 to the Blake Bortles led Jacksonville Jaguars shall we?
The Steelers went 13-3 and held the number 2 seed and a first round bye before welcoming in the red hot Jags in the divisional round. 4 Big Ben turnovers and 45 points later, and the Jags were moving onto the AFC Championship against the Pats.
The first 10 seconds were fairly normal, not cause for concern, and most likely what I myself even did after realizing our last best shot at a Lombardi was doomed by Blake Bortles - throw your Terrible Towel down and let out a few loud expletives.
What follows is where this particular reaction takes a turn.
At the :10 second mark this fellow declares to I'm assuming his wife / girlfriend / partner / maybe mom? that they're going to "find me dead" and that he's "going to kill himself".
Now we've all been caught up in the heat of our favorite team breaking our heart, but putting loved ones on warning that you're going to end your life could probably be taken down a few levels. Not only does he tell them they will find him dead, he tells them how he's going to do it.
Then the last part is the real kicker. It comes from a place that most fandom does as you get older and by that I mean your team that you follow and root for fills a void in an otherwise frustrating life at times. "DON'T ASK ME TO DO NOTHING!" the man exclaims "DISHES - NOTHING".
OK so we've found the real root cause of this tantrum brought on by the Steelers upset loss. My guy was just tired of doing household chores.
The latest one came on Sunday night after the Steelers fell in brutal fashion in the Wild Card round against the Browns.
Now sometimes you never know with these. I'm always a taaad bit skeptical that maybe it's staged because even as mad as the Steelers make me sometimes, I don't really ever consider ruining a perfectly fine flatscreen TV to then in return cause my trouble in my family / my bank account. Perhaps this fellow had another TV lined up already?
But for this instance we'll take it as a raw reaction. The tears really drive it home. Gotta love the plumber pants our friend has going here before he picks up the ladder to smash his screen.
The ladder is hilarious. Could throw a glass or mug. We've seen people ram TVs with their head or shoulder. Nah this dude went ballistic and the first thing in his line of vision was the ladder. That was his go-to. Then once the screen is smashed he pulls the caddy from Happy Gilmore and out of instinct has to toss the remote or whatever was on the entertainment center to the ground to fully finish the job. Tears the shirt. A grade A meltdown after a loss.
Both of these are all-timers. I promise you, while I was indeed devastated by such a putrid performance, I in fact did not end up with a reaction like this after my beloved Steelers blew up on national TV last night.
At the end of the day, I think the dishes guy takes the cake for me.
Until next year.