THE CLEVELAND BROWNS ARE GOING TO THE PLAYOFFS!!!!!

PARTY LIKE IT'S 2002!!!!! The Cleveland Browns are headed to the playoffs for the first time in 19 years. I don't care that we looked terrible against the Steelers backups today. I don't care that we're 11-5 but our point differential is in the negative. All I care about is that the Cleveland Browns are heading to the playoffs. And our lord and savior, Baker Mayfield, made it happen.

Retire that stupid ass jersey with all the Browns quarterbacks since we came back in 1999. We've found our guy. Sign his 5th year at the 50 yard line right now, and then go to the locker room and work on an extension for as long as he wants. PLAYOFFS? HE TOOK US TO THE PLAYOFFS? Build the statue.

And what's even better, it seems like the football gods are giving us their best shot at actually winning a playoff game. If I'm doing my calculations correctly, the Bills won, the Ravens won, and the Browns won. That means we're the #6 seed and we're heading to Pittsburgh to play the Steelers again next week. This is the BEST possible situation. Better than I could ever dream of. The Browns won 11 games, and we're heading to playoffs to play a team that is reeeeeeling. Say what you want, but the Steelers have lost 4 of their last 5. There isn't a better team to be traveling to in the entire AFC playoffs right now.

Tell us all week that we just struggled with their JV team. Please, I BEG YOU. This will be just like the Buckeyes game on Saturday. Tell us we have no chance. Tell them they shouldn't even have to play the game. Vegas, give us a touchdown! We can't play the Almighty Steelers when they have their starters in!

Don't tell the Browns this, but I really like our chances next week, if we can get healthy. My biggest concern, like it's always been this year, is will we have a full roster next week. If we play on Saturday, which of our covid players will be back? The NFL better give us the Sunday game, or Denzel Ward is out. We were without BJ Goodson, Malcolm Smith, Andrew Sendejo, Harrison Bryant, Denzel Ward, and Kevin Johnson today. And it only got worse as the game went on.

Ugh. That's a huge blow if he can't go next week. But whatever, we made the playoffs. We've got ourselves a seat at the table. We've got a chip and a chair. What else could you ask for if you're the Cleveland Browns?