Congressman Has His Tooth Fall Out In The Middle of a Press Conference

Somewhere ole White Sox Dave sighs a deep breath. Suddenly, kicking your ass doesn’t seem all that bad. What is this dude? 70 years old? He’s conservatively been a tooth-haver for 65 years and his big buddy fucker bicuspid betrayed during the biggest speech of his life? Unfortunate to say the least.

The theories are rolling in as to why his tooth fell out. My wife works in dental health and she showed me a report a few months ago that talked about covid-19 killing your teeth from the inside out because it makes your blood thicker than Megan Thee Stallion.

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If that’s the case, that’s what we should have led with. Death? Meh. Lung issues? Meh. Coughing fits? Meh. Your fucking teeth dying? Buddy, get me as many masks as you can find.

Luckily, there’s a congressman who is a dentist in Washington. I’m not sure if Rep Gosar brought his explorer or sucking tube to the Hill but that would certainly be exciting!