Did Wayne Gallman Become A Workhorse Running Back Because Eli Manning Farted In His Face? Many Football Experts Are Saying YES!
I think it's clear to anybody who has been watching the Giants over the last month that the team has started winning games because the offense has started to carry its own weight and putting up points. Part of that has been an improvement on the offensive line and Daniel Jones being unleashed as an absolute weapon. But there is no denying that Wayne Gallman's ascent as the lead running back and scoring at least one touchdown in five straight games has been instrumental in the Giants throwback power running game.
However, Gallman's rise has come so suddenly after being essentially ignored by Pat Shurmur, people are looking for when the light what made things click for Gallman. Was it the Giants firing that buckethead of a coach or something a little more personal? Well I think Steve Serby uncovered the answer in a great Q&A with Gallman.
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NY Post- Q: Give me your favorite single Eli Manning memory.
A: I wouldn’t say it was my favorite, but this is my most memorable — we’re in the locker room before a game, he was doing his stretching while I was sitting in my chair listening to music, and he walked by and he farted by my face. And walked away.
Q: You didn’t get him back?
A: There was no way I could get him back after that. Had to do something real nasty.
What's better than this? Guys being dudes. It turns out the Wayne Train doesn't run on coal or complex carbohydrates. Instead it runs on methane gas provided by Gallman's former QB1 that shits excellence.
Simply reading Wayne's description of Eli tells you that he was inspired by not only that little choo choo coming out of Elisha's rear end but also how he grinded no matter how good or bad things were going.
Q: What was it like playing with him?
A: It was great, man. Eli is one of the best people I’ve ever met. He’s a great leader, I’ve learned a lot with him of how he could handle adversity. Just the way he handled himself as a player — being on time, how he comes to work, how he comes to practice, how he comes to games prepared, take care of his body. He showed a lot.
THAT'S MY (FUTURE HALL OF FAME) QUARTERBACK! How do you lead? By working hard at practice, watching film until your eyes bleed, and keeping the locker room looser than Uncle Chaps' asshole by letting farts fly in your teammates faces. That's how you beat the greatest NFL coach, quarterback, and dynasty any of us will ever see in the Super Bowl. Twice. With one of those teams being an 18-0 juggernaut. I don't think Tom Brady is even capable of producing methane gas in his body while on TB12.
However Eli was able to inspire his guys by simply squeezing out the remnants of whatever food he ate the night before at a restaurant so fancy, you can't even find it on Google Maps (with his pants on because putting your naked buttcheeks on someone's face would be uncouth, even for a Manning brother). I guarantee that if you wanted to know which Giants player was about to get the Eli Bump once he called them over to smell greatness.
Put that man in Canton the millisecond he is eligible. Not just for the Super Bowls and statistics he put up while a Giant. But for all the lives he has impacted even after leaving The Meadowlands.