Four Assholes (Not Aliens) Removed and Dismantled The Monolith In Utah, Likely Dooming The Earth For Good

Welp, that was underwhelming to say the least. I was holding out hope this thing just vanished into thin air and the mystery would continue. As is most things in life, disappointment quickly filled the air. Nope no mystery, just four assholes in Utah who strolled up with a wheel barrow, dismantled it, and took the monolith to some scrap yard to sell it for some scratch. Seems like it wasn't built with an indestructible exterior either if these guys didn't need tools to take it apart. Lame. I envisioned anyone who touched it would melt into a puddle or be zapped inside like Jumanji.   

The alien guy in me is hoping this bad boy comes back together like some Iron Giant shit and reappears back in the desert. Maybe it goes on the offensive and teleports the four guys who tried to steal it to another galaxy. I've seen enough movies to know you sure as hell don't fuck with something like a monolith lying around in a desert alone. Is it more than likely a viral marketing campaign stunt to promote some weird artist or a rap album? Probably because the world sucks, but I want to believe so sue me. 

Maybe the aliens planted this fake monolith to make us go boy who cried wolf for when the real monolith pops up and destroys all life on Earth as we know it? It was a trap to see what we'd do. To no surprise we just destroyed it because that's what humans do to cool shit. This thing couldn't even last two whole weeks before we fucked with it. We truly deserve to be wiped off this planet.