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Smoke-ish Chick Arrested For Trying To Steal 131 Pairs Of Underwear From Walmart

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WSBTV – A 22-year-old woman is accused of stealing 131 underwear garments from a Cobb County Wal-Mart, according to police. Julia Marie Jones, of Jasper, allegedly tried to conceal the underwear, worth $749.95, in her purse, a handbag and grocery bags, her arrest warrant states. The alleged theft happened Sunday night at the Kennesaw store, located on Cobb Parkway, according to police. Jones was charged with felony theft by shoplifting and booked Monday into the Cobb jail. She was released early Tuesday after posting $5,000 bond, jail records showed.

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As far as broads that get arrested go, this chick is a 10. A jail 10. Fuck, she’s a jail 12. You can sell her for a pack of cigs in 3 seconds flat. She’d be the pick of the litter. And all because she tried to steal 131 pairs of panties from Walmart. Have to wonder why she decided 131 was the number. Because truthfully, I’m not sure I’ve owned 131 pairs of underwear in my life, nevermind all at the same time. So I question why she decided to go with 131 pairs all at once. You have to think this through. Why not chip away at them and do 13 trips of 10 pairs each? Slow and steady wins the race, when the race is stealing underwear from Walmart. And you have to wonder what type she was stealing. Basic cotton? Maybe silk panties, maybe a thong? Maybe she needed to steal 131 pairs all at once because it’s something cool I don’t even know about. Regardless, she wants you to know to fuck what you heard, you don’t have all the facts:

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I mean nobody here is judging. Judge-free zone. If you want to steal 131 pairs of undies, by my guest. But you can’t say that whatever happened is only your business. The second you get caught with that many pairs of underwear, the nation deserves to know what you were planning. I even think she should be allowed to keep them. But we need to know what her thought process behind this Oceans 11-esque scheme was. 131 pairs. She’s like little Tiffany from Men In Black with all those science books. Can’t trust her.

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