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Michigan's Next Head Coach Wishlist Is Laugh Out Loud Funny

Oh come on now. Let's not overreact and make any rash decisions. I know that Michigan got beat this weekend as three touchdown home favorites by their "little brother", and I know Jim Harbaugh is 0-5 vs Ohio State, BUT WHO ELSE COULD THEY GET THAT'S ANY BETTER? That's my favorite question Michigan fans ask. "I know we're 1-6 against our rivals at home, but who could we get that would do a better job than that?"

Ummm, I'll do it? Win one meaningful game in your entire tenure and get $8 million a year?? I'll do it for half of that! I can't guarantee that the product on the field will get any better, but at least you're not overpaying the most overrated head coach in the country anymore. Like, I know he's 29-0 in the Big House against all teams not named Ohio State or Michigan State, but I'm pretty sure the once proud University of Michigan would like to beat the Buckeyes at least once every hundred years. Harbaugh has to go, right?


And alas, it seems like the Michigan Men are finally done with Jimmy. 

Oh this should be good. Who does Michigan think they're worthy of getting? Nick Saban? Bill Belichick? Okay....I'm kidding.....but apparently they're not......

I will quickly laugh at the idea of them think Brent Venables is leaving for Michigan. He could go anywhere he wants, and that won't be Michigan. Next: Luke Fickell? That actually makes sense. Leaving Cincinnati for a Big Ten school. Okay….except he's literally a Columbus native, Ohio State grad, and former Buckeye head coach. Not a chance. The dudes blood runs scarlet and grey. Which leaves us with Les Miles. Folks, that ship has sailed. Take him if you want him. What a great hire that would be….for the rest of the Big Ten.

But what I'm here to talk about today is the name at the top of that list. "Urban Meyer, first and foremost". Oh my god. From the Twitter handle @MichiganSports. This has to be a joke right? A funny reply at the top of the comment section. But nope! THEY REALLY WANT / THINK THEY COULD GET HIM!!!!


The most popular response by far. This is laugh out loud funny to me. The idea that the most loved person in the entire state of Ohio, who owns a restaurant called 7-0 for his record against Michigan, would suddenly ruin his impeccable reputation just to go try and turn around a middle of the pack program in the dump that is the state of Michigan, is so preposterous that I just have to laugh. He could be the head coach of USC, Texas, or basically any other school in the country except 2 by dinner time if he made two phone calls this morning. And they think he'll choose his arch rival with a team that stinks? I thought Michigan Men were supposed to be smart? These must be those Walmart Wolverines I hear about. Didn't graduate from the university, but still get their $19.99 maize and blue hoodies off the for sale racks at their favorite department store each Fall.


Losers. All of them. 

Let me get out ahead of this now. Credit Ohio's Tate. If and when Michigan fires Jim Harbaugh after losing by 50 in the rivalry game at the end of the year, Urban Meyer is NOT interested. I really hope they call him though. How funny would that be? A story to tell your kids about. Michigan came crawling to Urban and he shut the door on them like a stray puppy trying to get a place to sleep. Lol, Urban Meyer to Michigan. I've seen it all.