If There's Such Thing As A Cool Way To Die, Getting Stabbed In The Chest By A Swordfish Is A Cool Way To Die
The Register- Randy Llanes, a 47-year-old Hawaiian man, has died after leaping into the water to spear a swordfish, receiving a fatal injury in return for the one he delivered. The Department of Land and Natural Resources reports that the Kona fishing charter boat captain was fatally injured by a broadbill swordfish he had speared in the Honokohau small boat harbour in Hawaii. Llanes had seen a swordfish swimming in the harbour in the late morning. Witnesses saw him jump into the water and spear the fish before it struck him in the chest with its sharp bill. He was a tough man, his sister-in-law told the local television station. “He was such a tough guy that everyone’s scared of him,” the BBC reports her as saying. “The whole harbour’s scared of him.” Bystanders recovered an unresponsive Llanes from the water and attempted to resuscitate him while waiting for the Hawaii Fire Department to arrive. He was taken to Kona Community Hospital, where he was pronounced dead. The fish was about three feet long with a bill of about the same length, and weighed around 40 pounds.
Like the title of the blog says, I’m not sure there is a cool way to die. Dying SUCKS. You get wiped off the planet for eternity and never get to eat donuts again. It’s a real drag that people are constantly trying to avoid with doctor’s visits and exercise. With that said, getting stabbed in the chest by a swordfish is a cool-as-fuck way to die. It might be the coolest. It really is considering some of the alternatives. People die everyday. Some people die by slipping off the side of the curb and landing wrong. Think about that. Those people’s entire complicated lives (success, failure, birthday parties, Christmases, times they had sex, times they ate fast food 4 times in one day) all led up to the moment where a sloped piece of concrete caused them to slip and fall and be gone forever. Lame as shit. But getting stabbed by a swordfish? That’s the opposite of lame. It’s epic. People can tell stories about getting killed like that. His kids can now say, “My Dad got a swordfish’s nose plunged into his chest and that’s how he went.” And I know the guy was only 47 years old and that sucks but you know what? I think I would trade 25 or so years of my life in order to die awesomely. Die at 47 and die by swordfish or hold on for another 30 years and die simply because your body sucks. Give me the swordfish death all day.
Speaking of swordfish, here’s a NSFW picture of topless Halle Berry.
