Someone Made A WAP Music Video With A Bunch Of Disney Characters And Quite Frankly, It Is A Fucking Masterpiece

I blogged this video yesterday despite it feeling like the perfect video for when everyone needed to burn a few minutes at work because I fully expected Disney's legal team to dust off one of the Death Stars they bought from George Lucas and vaporize this wonderful content from the internet forever before the end of the day if the 2020 internet mob didn't kill it first. Well The Mouse did what it always does and dropped the copyright hammer down on the original video and the internet followed suit by doing what it always does, which is reupload the banned content on a different channel to get those sweet sweet clicks. Hence why I am republishing my own blog a day later.

My entire life I thought Disney had built its animated catalog in an effort to become a capitalistic giant and take over the world one movie ticket, stuffed animal, and bank account draining trip to Disney World at a time. However, after seeing every single word in this song paired perfectly with something from a Disney flick (the Mike Wazowski tonsil line moment killed me), I am now positive that Disney slow playing things for over 50 years to create that three minutes of magic with Walt's severed head calling the shots smutty line by smutty line. I don't actually believe that but the thought of a dismembered, unfrozen, still Wet Ass Disney being torn if he should use Flounder from Little Mermaid or the light fish from Finding Nemo for the "If he ate my ass, he's a bottom feeder" line has me rolling.

Whenever I see Michael Angelo sprinkle in the perfect old school Barstool moment in an episode of The Rundown, I go full Rick Dalton from my computer chair.

So shout out Melissa Schultz for having me do that roughly 100 times this morning by making some legitimate internet magic with her extra time in this quarantined coronaworld and going through roughly 8 zillion hours of footage to somehow find every Disney character expressing the words wet, ass, and/or pussy to create the exact video that the world needs right now.