Some people spent quarantine getting in shape while others spent it becoming more handy and doing projects around the house. Well as someone that did neither, I would like to extend a big ol' "Fuck you" to those groups of people. Instead, I would like to shout out the people that spent quarantine either living on or making content for this digital hellscape we call the internet. I'm not talking about the Tik Tok'ers who make shit that my old brain can't compute or boomers flooding your inbox with every political meme they saw on Facebook. I'm talking wholesome shit everyone with a soul can enjoy, like training Corgi Bryant here for what I imagine was DAYS to pull Harlem Globetrotter level trick shots out of his tail. I remember when lockdown first started, everyone was doing trick shot videos and making Rube Goldberg machines before boredom overtook us. But teaching your dog to shoot every time he hears the word "KOBE" is just good parenting. The fact I haven't taught my two human pets, more commonly referred to as my kids, to do the same is honestly embarrassing and worthy of a lap that I am going to run right now before teaching them about the Mamba Mentality.
Yeah, Kobe’s right. You guys know I'm marshmallow soft and don't even have a garter snake mentality.