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Buddy. Could You Just Make My Drink Already?

Picture this. You're at a bar for the first time in months. You're a man who is under 6' tall so it's already impossible for you to get the attention of the bartender to order a drink. You try holding your card up but it's just a debit card so that backfires because now the bartender thinks you're a poor who isn't going to tip. You get on your tiptoes. Maybe the bar has foot rail that you can stand on to make yourself a little taller. You finally lock eye contact on the bartender and he knows you've been waiting. Then a group of girls show up at the other end of the bar and he heads that direction. 7 minutes later, you're finally up. You don't even really want a drink anymore at this point because you've already sobered up after having to wait forever to get a drink. But it's a matter of principle now. You're not a huge mixed drink guy but you know you can't wait another half hour for a beer. So you keep it simple and order a rum & coke. 

Hey, man. No offense or anything but could I just give you some money and then you just make my drink, please? Pretty standard transaction that's about to occur here. No need for the theatrics. And if I need to sit through an entire circus act, the least you could do is make it a double. 

I'll be honest though, this move kicked ass. 

Anyway, here's all you need to know on bartending. Don't jizz on anything. 

@JordieBarstool