Bleach. Someone get me the bleach. Because this is flat out embarrassing. And to be honest, I don't know how I couldn't see this one coming today. For the 16th straight year, I am SHOCKED the Browns are bad. 

An interception. A failed fake punt. A missed extra point. Allowing a 99 yard drive. A drop from our diva wide receiver. A missed field goal. And giving up a yard 70 yard drive in 30 seconds. Oh, and that was all just in the 1st half. SAME OLD BROWNS.

I'm not even sure who I'm most mad at. Is it Baker? I'll tell you what buddy, you better be a whole lot better next week or else we'll be looking for your replacement well before the 2021 draft. Justin Fields would look good in the orange and brown, but we might see Case Keenum first. You were terrible today. But your friend OBJ didn't help you out either. First of all, we need to stop force feeding OBJ. I know he has feelings and will get all pissy if we don't get him touches, but forcing it to him clearly is not working. And even when we do get him a chance to catch the ball, he drops it! OBJ is on my shit list too. He probably likes being on there, but I don't. Stefanski, you're on the list too. What a terrible call on the fake punt. Way to set the tone for the year, Kev. I'm not jumping off your bandwagon just yet, but if I closed my eyes today I could've sworn Freddie Kitchens was coaching this team. And that is NOT good.

Ugh. Everything that could've gone wrong today did. I mean, even the fact that we have to watch Ohio State's JK Dobbins tear us up for the next decade hurt. And speaking of hurt, our #10 overall pick in the draft this year limping off the field sucked as well.

Nice. You know what else is questionable right now? My pride. My feelings. My well-being. I mean, I really thought this was the year. How can this team be bad again? HOW?

BUT, and this is the only but I'll give, maybe the Ravens are just really really good? I mean, they did go 14-2 last year and have the reigning MVP. We were at their place. Losing by 1 or losing by 41 is the same in the record book. And 15-1 still makes the playoffs!! Listen, I know today sucked, but we host the Bengals on Thursday Night this week. Today was awful but we could be feeling a whole lot better about ourselves in 5 days. This season isn't over, YET.

But for now:

Jason Miller. Getty Images.