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Derek Mason Says Vanderbilt's Depth Chart Has 'Goons and Goblins' Rather Than 1s and 2s

In the latest dumbfuckery out of the worst athletic department in the Power Five, Vanderbilt head coach Derek Mason said Friday his team doesn't have 1s and 2s on the depth chart, but rather "goons and goblins."

Whenever the conversation about SEC rivalries comes about, I always do my best to explain to people how different Vanderbilt is. It's really unlike any other university in the country. I hate Alabama, Florida, Georgia and Kentucky for all the same general reasons: their fans are all bad people and I want Tennessee to beat them. Vanderbilt is a completely different animal.

It's an elite university which does not care about athletics at all but which also refuses to leave the nation's premier athletic conference because of the financial benefits — that it doesn't even use to improve its abysmal athletic department. Its fans literally live only to beat Tennessee and if they end up at 6-6 and sneak into a bowl game, all the better.

So my hatred for Vanderbilt comes from a very different place than those other schools. Its fans are truly just the most annoying and unreasonable people you could ever have the displeasure of being around.

And they are led by a man who perfectly embodies their attitude. Mason is 27-47 in six seasons at Vandy's head coach and his claim to fame is being 3-3 against the Volunteers in that time — arguably the worst six-year period in Tennessee football history, for what it's worth. And he runs around spewing this nonsense about goons and goblins and whatever else he can think of before his team gets its teeth kicked in for another year.

Derek Mason is Butch Jones without any of the fluky success.