We made it to the NFL season everyone! Well unless an asteroid smashes into the planet and ends life as we know it in the very short time between when I published this blog and when the game actually kicks off, which actually is probably going to happen now that I think about it. But on the off chance 2020 doesn't dickslap us across the forehead one last time, soak in some touchdowns while you envision your fantasy players taking the six point plunge multiple times tonight including the first touchdown to ease your nerves. Shout out to these people for living the dream right now or at least as close to the dream as you can be sitting in an empty stadium yet not giving each other a buffer seat.
Also shout out to Devery Henderson, Greg Jennings, Kevin Ogletree, Vonta Leech, John Kuhn, Rob Gronkowski, Kelvin Benjamin, Mike Gillislee, Jay Ajayi, and Jimmy Graham for getting things started off right for their team and proving (for the most part) you don't need to be a superstar to score the first tuddie of the season. The only player I had to look up in that video was Gillislee because I didn't hear or see his name in the highlight and I honestly forgot he existed despite lusting over him for months while doing my fantasy research. Just a reminder that none of us actually know what the fuck is going to happen tonight let alone the rest of this season.
Actually I do know one thing, which is the answer to the question in that tweet. Give me the Superduper fast receiver on the best offense in the league that also will have a chance to score a touchdown before any other player in the game if the Chiefs win the coin toss because he returns kickoffs.
Damn it feels good to be back watching football and betting on Mecole Hardman first touchdown prop bets again.