Excuse the clickbait headline, but I'll get to that in a moment. Everyone is talking about how David Blaine ascended like a billion feet into the sky today with balloons. You can watch the whole thing here:
Snooooooozzzzeeeeee. Not impressed. He had oxygen and parachutes and every other thing he needed to live. I'm sorry, but I'm from the old school and expect my magicians and daredevils to *actually* be defying death when they're performing their stunts. That's exactly why I think Nick Walenda should go fuck himself. Get that harness the fuck out of my face. If there is next to no possibility of him falling into liquefying magma, I don't give a shit about him walking on the tight rope.
But watching Blaine pull this stunt today brought back some memories of one of the greatest shows in TV history, Trigger Happy TV. It was this British hidden camera show where snaggletoothed Brits would fuck with unbeknownst onlookers and it was absolutely fucking hilarious. Blaines stunt this morning reminded me of this prank:
Now THAT is how to float away on balloons. Just tie it up to a fake baby and make people freak the FUCK out that actual death is about to occur. Have them shit their pants a little bit because they're not privy to the fact that it's actually a doll tied to the balloons, not a real life infant. Fucking hilarious.
Oh, and if you haven't seen Trigger Happy TV before, I highly implore you spend the rest of your afternoon watching it on YouTube. Beyond funny, one of the truly great forgotten TV shows of our time:
Enjoy! And also enjoy our kill race in Verdansk right now.