St. Patrick's Day Collection | T-Shirts, Hoodies, Crewnecks, Hats, FlagsSHOP NOW

You've Never Wanted Anything as Badly as This Guy Wants to Eliminate the Term 'Boneless Wings' in Lincoln, Nebraska

The debate as to the merits of boneless wings is one which is seemingly destined to go on forever. One party says they're not really wings, the other says they're still delicious and around and around we go for eternity. But no longer will that be the case in Lincoln, Nebraska if this guy gets his way.

At a recent city council meeting, concerned citizen Ander Christensen stepped to the podium to address what he feels is the biggest issue plaguing Nebraska's capital.

"Lincoln has the opportunity to be a social leader in this country. We have been casually ignoring a problem that has gotten so out of control that our children are throwing around names and words without even understanding their true meaning," Christensen said. "I'm talking about boneless chicken wings."

In 2020, I must concur that there is no bigger issue which needs addressing in this country than the use of the term "boneless wings" specifically in Lincoln, Nebraska. They say if you want to make a change, start at the local level, and it appears this man took that to heart.

"I propose that we, as a city, remove the term 'boneless wings' from our menus and from our hearts," Christensen said. "I propose that we re-name boneless wings in the city of Lincoln. We can call them 'buffalo style chicken tenders.' We can call them 'wet tenders.' We can call them 'saucy nugs' or 'trash.' We can take these steps and show the country where we stand — and that we've been living a lie for far too long."

In this debate, I have always taken the stance that I don't care what anybody else does and I don't want anybody caring what I do. I enjoy boneless wings. I don't care if you think they should be called something f\different or if you don't like them; this is America and I'll do what I want.

That said, I'm actually 100 percent down with changing the name to saucy nugs. That hits different. But I also don't want to give this guy, whose priorities are very clearly out of whack, the satisfaction of getting that change made to the general lexicon, so I'm conflicted.

Either way, can't we all just get along and agree that all forms of chicken tossed in the hottest sauce one can find are delicious? We need to be united on this front now more than ever.