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Chelsea Continue To Dominate The Transfer Market As They Sign Sensational Ben Chilwell From Leicester, Amongst Others


Chelsea have signed Leicester City defender Ben Chilwell, the club have announced.

Sources told ESPN on Friday that the deal was close to being done after Leicester dropped their £80 million valuation, and the two clubs eventually agreed a deal for £50m.

sidenote - getting soccer news from ESPN doesn't feel right (usually reserved for British tabloids) but it was one of the only articles I could find with the actual price of Chilwell. 

Fucking 'ave that ya bastards. Just when it seemed like Chelsea would run into an invisible wall of their own doing, they come right back in. There was a pretty long stretch where it seemed like Leicester was gonna try and do ole run around with Chelsea. Set a high transfer fee, have Chelsea meet it only to raise it again and again and again. It's essentially what Leverkusen has been doing to Chelsea for the past two months with Haevertz, only Leicester knew when to just cash out. Did they want £80m? For a left-back? Mental. At that rate let him walk and go talk to a club with rational thinking humans. 

Honestly, it feels like a no brainer for them to let him go. Sure, Leicester finished 5th in the Premier League this year but when you're able to get £50m for a left-back, you should probably take it. Especially when that £50m is gonna be your transfer funds for the next 5 fucking years like it will be for Leicester City. They'll go through the same cycle for the next young star they develop - so is world football. 

As for Chelsea, the rich just get richer.

"You lot need to stop signing attackers and sign some defenders" -the haters

Well, there ya go ya twats. We've just acquired one of the world's best left-backs. Long gone are the days of Marcos Alonso running into the opposing team's penalty area, losing the ball because he shite with his right foot, followed immediately by a leisurely stroll back to his normal post. By that point it's already one-on-one with Kepa and we all know how that ends. Now we've got (hopefully) Ashley Cole v.2 in our midst. A great signing that will sure up our backline, hopefully, we can get some more defe-

Wait a minute...


Giphy Images.

A free transfer as well? Well, don't mind if I do. There were even some reports this morning that when Silva joins the blues, he'll be handed the armband immediately. Making me think this deal is more legit than not. This would finally give Chelsea a leader in the center of defense rather than just alternating between Zouma and Christensen, praying one of them actually has a favorable outing. The only thing about making him captain is that it kind of feels like a slap in the face to Azpilicueta, but he's a jolly lad and probably wouldn't mind. Add young Malang Sarr to the mix - even though he will most definitely join the loan army for now - and we're cooking with some fucking gas.

Maybe, one day, Leverkusen and Chelsea can stop play tiddleywinks and get a fucking deal done for Havertz. After that, it'll be a goalkeeper. It would be a real shame if someone like Nick Pope or Dean Henderson found their way to Stamford Bridge to play behind this new and improved backline. 

God damn Chelsea are so fucking back. Carefree. 

Now enjoy the newest Chelsea signing's highlight tape: