Australian Football Star Is Suspended For The Season Because His Girlfriend Broke Into The Bubble And Got Caught By His Teammates

You want definitive proof that young people are stupid? Well, let me introduce you to Elijah Taylor, a 19-year old star in the Australian Football League and his 18-year old girlfriend Lekhani Pearce. Taylor was just suspended for the rest of the entire season and fined $35,000 because Pearce snuck into the AFL bubble (via NY Post): 

Last week, Pearce breached the Sydney Swans’ quarantine area to visit 19-year-old Taylor, allegedly jumping fences and crossing a golf course to reunite with her athlete beau. On Tuesday, Pearce apologized for the couple’s actions, calling their missteps “a really big mistake.”

And that is how you know young people are morons. I say it all the time about college kids, the same applies to Australia college aged people too. You're a star in a pro sports league. You're in the middle of a season and living in a bubble. You gotta know what's gonna happen - a lot of jerking off. You just gotta deal with it for a few months until your season is done. You can't be having your girlfriend cross a golf course and hop fences like she's in Candyland to get to the finish line. 

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Not only that, but you get busted by your teammates? Did you not watch The Last Dance? You hide Carmen Electra in your hotel room while MJ is banging on the door to bring you back to Chicago. That's just sneaking someone in your room 101. It just shows that horny always wins. It's damn near undefeated. You could have held out and just done your job. You could have gone a few months. 

But horny always wins.