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David Blaine Is Going To Float Across The Hudson River Using A Bunch Of Balloons Like The Old Fuck From "Up"


NYP - Magician David Blaine will attempt his first live stunt in nearly a decade in a YouTube-exclusive livestream later this month.

In the live special, Blaine will float through the air — a la Pixar’s “Up” — elevated by a bunch of helium-filled balloons. The multi-hour “David Blaine Ascension” global livestream event will take place on the performer’s YouTube channel on Monday, Aug. 31.

“This stunt has been 10 years in the making,” Blaine tweeted Wednesday. “Let’s turn worry into wonder and take magic to new heights.”

Blaine will attempt to float across the Hudson River, launching with a cluster of balloons from New Jersey across his native New York City skyline.


Giphy Images.


I'm not even a David Blaine hater, but this one doesn't impress me. Can't you just do some math and figure out how many balloons you need to float across the river? Seems like I could do this if I had a few hundred dollars and access to a Party, Party, Party. And what the fuck does this even mean, "turn worry into wonder". Worry into wonder? Who is worrying about if David Blaine can get across the Hudson? Worse possible scenario is a flock of seagulls attacks him midway and he does a cannonball into a very swimmable river. I mean fucking Sully landed an entire plane on it and nobody died, so I don't think a 150 pound man with some balloons tied to his ankles is in any danger.

Still gonna watch though. Fuckin' David Blaine.




PS: This video is from 2006. An OG OG OG OG OG YouTube video. Fun fact: I was in a communications class (shout out comm majors, we outchea) in 2006 and the professor had us raise our hand if we had ever heard of YouTube. That's right, youngins. HEARD OF YOUTUBE. About 40% of the class raised their hands. 2006, sigh, simpler times.