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NSFW

I took the weekend off of bussing tables at Patriot's Diner in Woonsocket to go and visit my aunt and uncle's in Brookline for a few days. I love going up to the motherland; they have a wicked nice 3 bedroom house with an an above ground pool that is 4 feet deep that you can cool off in during the hot summer months. The pool even comes equipped with a volleyball net that is strewn across it. I gotta say, we had some wicked competitive pool volleyball games at their place over the years, and this weekend was no different... except for one small family tiff. Before I get to that, just know that there's nothing better than chilling in that pool, Ray Bans and backwards Sox hat on, to get a little R and R in the heat of summer.

Anyways, it went like this: I got in a little bit of trouble because I spiked a volleyball in my little cousin Sean's face in a fit of rage after my other cousin failed to set me up properly the point before and I whiffed on my spike attempt. Not my fault he's a wicked brutal athlete and couldn't handle a weak ass volleyball damn near burning his face off. 

All I could think about after the fighting settled was how Conan O'Brien, (Brookline Class of '81) would roll over in his grave if he saw the amount of crying my cousin did. Sean did the Spartan Warriors dirty with that display of emotion. Michael Dukakis, (Brookline Class of '51), would have cringed, though he probably would have found a way to blame President Bush (41) for the act. All in all, it was an ugly scene and one that got even uglier a few moments later. 

We were sucking back a few bottles of grandpa's old cough medicine (Sam Adams, of course) when a debate started that went something like this: "Is Tom Brady the GOAT?" 

My uncle called Tom Brady a trader and didn't want anything to do with him anymore for bailing on the dynasty. I said "STFU he gave us SIX championships you fucking imbecile" and he said "YEAH IT COULDA BEEN AT LEAST 2 OR 3 MORE". Now, I don't necessarily disagree, it's just that all good things come to an end. Anyone who thinks that Tom Brady was going to be here forever and always is just a meathead, plain and simple. Don't take it out on Tom, Tom's the GOAT. 

This is going to be an atypical post of mine. I will try my best to NOT stick to sports and to stick to smut, but as we get closer and closer to football season I just couldn't let a post go without giving a little NSFW hardcore Tom Brady porn for the masses. The GOAT argument starts and ends with this: Tom Brady followed by Larry Bird, Ted Williams, Bobby Orr and of course Wahlberg/Wahlberg/Damon/Afleck. That's it. That's the list.

And here is some T&A so I don't break character. Again, this won't be a normal thing from me, your neighborhood smut guy. 

Fap, fap, fap away boys!!