Mets got shellacked again tonight. Their season is over. The fact that anybody looked at that rotation and thought "Yea this team can win!" or the fact that anybody believed in guys like Edlose Diaz and Jeurys Familia in the bullpen...its all simply preposterous.
But not NEARLY as preposterous as Keith Hernandez not knowing that "PB&J" means Peanut Butter and Jelly. I mean thats one of the more ridiculous things I've ever heard. Keith is for sure one of those dudes that is so obsessed with baseball that I dont expect him to be the most well rounded, most informed individual on the planet. By no means is he an unintelligent man, its just that his brain is filled with baseball knowledge, replays of him going opposite field to drive in a pair, visions of picking balls out of the dirt, and cloudy memories of the 80s where he lived like Tony Montana. Nothing more. He knows what he knows, and he doesnt know what he doesnt know. But the question is...is it possible to be an adult human with a functioning brain, thriving in a profession where you speak for a living, and not know what "PB&J" means? His broadcasts are chock full of phrases and euphemisms. He knows every baseball acronym under the sun. He's given us countless moments of wit and humor, with clever references and call backs. And you're telling me he doesnt know the abbreviation for peanut butter and jelly???
And it wasn't just like, a brain fart. It wasnt like he quickly recovered after realizing his mistake. He was dumbfounded. That exasperated "WHAT IS a PB&J?" You coulda given him a thousand guesses and he would have never landed on Peanut Butter and Jelly. Plus its not like it was some sort of weakness in the food knowledge realm - he knows his BLT, but not his PB&J. Its not like he's too old...or from a different country...or out of touch with the youth. He's got kids who got kids. No matter what angle you examine Keith Hernandez, theres no excuse for not knowing the shorthand for what I believe to be the most well known sandwich in history. Quite simply put, I am astounded.
PS - I love how he stuck to his guns though. "Speak English, Gelbs!" He's so goddam cocksure in everything he does that he was ready to blame Skippy and Smuckers for this. He wasnt wrong, Peanut Butter was wrong. It was Jelly's fault. For fuck's sake, HE'S KEITH HERNANDEZ!