Well fuck me sideways we finally have ourselves a deal bright and early this morning. After months of waiting and months of booing, the Cubs finally did their job and delivered a television product to a majority of its local audience. The shit we pride ourselves on around here really makes you think.
Personally I'm absolutely disgusted with everything that has to do with this television network. I've said it a thousand times so what's one more go - all I give a fuck about is competitive baseball. Don't give me a C+ bullpen for 3 years running then tell me I should be pumped for the new TV station. Fuck your TV station when I'm watching Dillon Maples spike 3 sliders in a row because we never had the foresight or foreskin to go sign a couple decent veteran relievers.
Is it nice to have 24/7 access to the Cubs? Not really if they're not going to be mediocre like the last two seasons. I certainly thought we'd get more than 2 NL Central titles with this core. But Hey we got the Marquee Network on Comcast finally and I can imagine everyone in the business department at 1060 W. Addison is just so proud of themselves.
Those poor baseball operations guys on the other side of the building. It must suck having to play second fiddle to the business needs year in and year out. But probably the worst is that the Cubs won't even make a formal announcement. They're just throwing Crane Kenney on the airwaves and letting him break the great news while your Cubs group chat blows up with excitement. Literally this has been the #1 question anyone anywhere in the Cubs Nation has been asking and instead we get sponsored Toyota posts because of course we do:
Friendly reminder that if you actually like the "playing baseball" aspect of the Chicago Cubs then you can count on me over the next 66 days well into the expanded playoff format. You can count on me because for the last couple years I've had to count on David DeJesus and thankfully those days are long gone. But my iron still remains sharpened and forged by the fires that are otherwise known as bad local baseball coverage. Follow me on twitter for lineup previews and instagram for post-game shows. The party starts now.
PS - I wouldn't make a formal announcement either if meant having to credit me. Imagine the terror. BTW where the fuck are you on this one Bob Nightengale? Jesse Rogers. Jon HEYMAN. You guys are losing your meat.