The PlayBarstool App Is HereDownload Now

Do Not Fuck With The Census Cowboy

You might be wondering what Chicago's mayor is doing next to a man on a horse at a press conference and to that I'd say Valid question. At first glance, it certainly seems a bit strange that we'd have a lone cowboy alongside our head elected official when talking about things like COVID and gun violence but then I remind you that we're in the middle of a Census year and we can't take a risk the federal government stiffs us on grants and shit. So we're getting the Census Cowboy out in full force to literally come knock on your door if you don't turn in your Census information. I'm actually no joking. 

For more on the Dreadhead Cowboy and why people love this guy, watch this video. He is absolutely fucking electric. 

The fact he's parlayed this into being on stage with Chicago's mayor in less than 6 weeks is downright incredible. And at some level, give credit Lori because she wanted people talking about the Census and now she got it. Here's your blog about the Cowboy.

But more importantly give her credit for a solid green hat. A lot of people don't like wearing green but personally I find green hats to be a real Power Move. If you were at Mitchapalooza in 2003 then you know what I'm talking about. 

End of the day though if you want people to fill out the census, maybe don't offer up the most appealing person in the city right now to come hang out. Like imagine having a house party and he comes knocking because you didn't turn your forms in. Try and tell me that wouldn't instantly make the night that much better. If anything there's a major incentive to completely avoid this now at the chance you'd get an impromptu horse riding lesson in Old Town. Literally down an Old Town road. But that's just my brain and I obviously don't know shit.  

Fill out the census here