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Who In History Would Be Absolutely Shocked By How They Are Remembered Today?

 

I was thinking about this hypothetical all weekend and tweeted it out last night- who, if they came back to life right now, would be dumbfounded by how they are remembered? And I think the number 1 answer on the board gotta be Christopher Columbus. Dude was out there raping and murdering and pillaging and conducting genocides. He was a bad dude. And so imagine how confused he'd be if we brought him into current times and he's like...a pretty popular guy! We name everything for him in this country, and he didn't even discover the country! He never even stepped foot in America and we have a god damn holiday for him! I love the idea of him trying to play it cool, like "yeah man, sup I'm Chris", being so fucking confused why he's so popular in this country he had nothing to do with. He probably thinks he went down in history as this evil piece of shit who sailed to the Bahamas and stole all their gold, spices, and women and would be floored if he found out every state in America has a major city named after him. Bananas.

I got some other good answers too. Obviously Jesus pops out. Him finding out people still believe he walked on water. He'd be like "I said that as a joke and just kept going with the bit!" I think he'd be pretty stoked to find out how famous he got. Probably sort of confused by the entire Santa Claus/Easter Bunny thing though. 

I loved this answer:

 

 

Another explorer, Marco Polo. Hey Marco, have no idea what you explored or what you found, but children scream your name in every swimming pool in the world. Quite a legacy to be honest. 

 

 

2 World Wars after he got shot. WORLD WARS! Franz doesn't get enough credit for that.

 

 

Obviously a great answer. Helen Keller had zero, zippy idea she "graduated college" and "wrote books". All just a PR campaign by her mother. I believe KFC called Helen Keller the original Kardashian, or something of the sort. Just working the media and pulling the strings. It is completely outlandish to think Helen did 99% of the things they said she did. Would love HK to come back to life (with the ability to speak and hear) and show her what they say she did. "Yeah they sprinkled water on my hand that one time, but that's about it". I don't blame Helen Keller, but boy is she a fraud. 

 

And one last one:

 

 

Fuckin' Dicks out for Harambe. I would love to be in the room with Harambe (he can interact with humans in this scenario) and show him the memes, the tshirts, the never ending Summer of Harambe. I don't know if anyone has ever died a more noble death than the H Man.