Shout out giphy for adding a little extra clickbait to this blog
NY Post- In an incident that redefines “sleeping it off,” a Chinese man’s bladder burst when he unknowingly held his pee in for 18 hours after binging on booze. The 40-year-old man, identified only as Mr. Hu, reportedly fell asleep — ahem, passed out? — after downing 10 bottles of beer during a heavy drinking session the night prior — without heeding nature’s call once, reports Zhuji Daily.
After experiencing searing abdominal pains, the lager-logged soul reported to the to Zhuji People’s Hospital in Zhejiang, eastern China, where a CT scan revealed that his bladder was torn in three places. The pee-induced pain was so intense that Hu was unable to lie flat, and he failed to relieve himself of his massive urine reservoir despite several attempts. Even worse, one of the holes had ruptured toward the patient’s abdominal cavity and forced part of his intestines to spill into the bladder — a complication doctors deemed potentially fatal if not fixed immediately.
I was all ready to deem Mr. Hu a hero for being a cautionary tale for the millions of bros around the world drinking zillions of beers and holding in their piss until they got to a bathroom or the nearest bush. We've all had that one moment where we had to pee so bad, we literally thought we were going to explode. My personal moment was during a bachelor party to Shea Stadium. I ran off the party bus, pissed behind the first tree I could find, and honestly think I briefly knew what heaven felt like. I honestly wasn't sure if a bladder could explode if the pressure valve wasn't hit until Mr. Hu showed me the light.
But my guy Hu Daddy almost losing his life over 10 beers is a fucking joke. I'm not trying to be a Hardo either. But if your body has to smash the Self Destruct button on the bladder after less than a dozen beers with the fellas, it is a trash body that deserves to go boom. Plain and simple. Either wake up and go to the bathroom or grow up and piss yourself in bed like an adult. I don't know how you unknowingly hold in pee for 18 minutes let alone 18 hours. But since this is a random clickbaity story from China, I'm going to assume everything is 100% true and accurate.
This is the part of the blog where I remind everyone that the once potential savior of the Mets missed games because he allegedly didn't know how to handle his piss either, which would be the most embarrassing moments of the century for most franchises but is barely a blip on the Mets radar over the last 5 years.