Girlfriend Kills Boyfriend's Goldfish With Bleach Over An Argument Because Women

FLORIDA (obvs) –  An Orlando-area woman is facing charges after she was accused of trashing her boyfriend’s home in Pine Hills and using bleach to kill his goldfish, a report alleges. Angela Garcia, 32, was charged with felony criminal mischief and animal cruelty on Saturday, according to a report from the Orange County Sheriff’s Office.

The alleged victim’s son told deputies Garcia destroyed electronic devices and poured bleach into his father’s fish tank, killing five goldfish.  A flat-screen TV in his father’s bedroom also was destroyed. The son said Garcia and his father got into an argument earlier in the day when she was told to leave. 

I’ve never been been much of a fish guy. You get them in a plastic bag at a carnival when you’re 5 and then they die a few short weeks later. You can’t play with them at all, you just have to watch them swim into the glass every other 30 seconds because they’re too dumb to realize they’re in a tank. But with that being said, fish are friends not food. And certainly not something that some cunt-faced broad from Florida should ever be dousing in a pool of bleach. Killing someone’s pet might even be more psychotic than killing an actual human. Not only did the pet never do anything to harm you, but now that person has to go on the rest of his or her life without them. I’m a firm believer that #AllPetsMatter. So yeah, maybe hamsters and fish and maybe even birds are a little weird. But they’re still someone’s pet regardless. If you kill a pet, you should suffer the same fate as Petey the parakeet. End of discussion.

P.S. – Angela Garcia was probably a dead fish in the bed so this is pretty fitting. Heyoooo.