Advertisement

Check Out This Professor Who Pretty Much Invented the Quarantine but Broke Quarantine to Get Laid

Source - The scientist whose advice prompted Boris Johnson to lock down Britain resigned from his Government advisory position on Tuesday night as The Telegraph can reveal he broke social distancing rules to meet his married lover.

Professor Neil Ferguson allowed the woman to visit him at home during the lockdown while lecturing the public on the need for strict social distancing in order to reduce the spread of coronavirus. The woman lives with her husband and their children in another house.

The epidemiologist leads the team at Imperial College London that produced the computer-modelled research that led to the national lockdown, which claimed that more than 500,000 Britons would die without the measures. 

And -  While Professor Ferguson frequently appeared in the media to defend his work and to tell the public not to break the lockdown rules, he was himself spectacularly breaking them in secret, according to a report in Britain’s Daily Telegraph, which claims the hard-line scientist was meeting his married lover.

The paper names Antonia Staats, a married mother, who was quarantined with her family at a separate address to the professor. Breaching the terms of the lockdown — as enforced by police — she travelled to Ferguson’s own home on at least two occasions, the paper claims. ...

Admitting his error, Professor Ferguson told the paper:

“I accept I made an error of judgment and took the wrong course of action."

A quick review of Prof. Neil Ferguson's track record seems to indicate that he has a pretty bad track record when it comes to predicting pandemics. The shorthand is that, if there's ever an infectious disease and he's setting the line how many will die from it, hammer the Under. 

  • In 2002, he predicted 50,000 people in England would die of Mad Cow. The actual total was 177.
  • In 2005, he said 200 million people would die from the Bird Flu. The worldwide total ended up being 282. Over six years.
  • Four years later, he called 65,000 Brits dying of Swine Flu. That total was 457.

So if ever you're looking for an academic to appraise the value of your house or estimate your penis size, he's your guy. 

But that's neither here nor there. We all make predictions that are off by a factor of 709,000 times once in a while. Hell, I'm the guy who said Tom Brady would stay in New England, so who am I throw rocks? 

The only question that matters is, can we blame Prof. Ferguson for violating the rules he himself established on both sides of the Atlantic for some booty calls? Let's investigate.

Here is Antonia Staats:

Yup. This was worth it.

Reportedly she works for an Anti-Climate Change group. She lives in multi-million dollar mansion with her husband and kids. And they allegedly have an open marriage. So if it's alright with Antonia, it's alright with her husband, and it's all right with the English-speaking world's foremost authority on how best to handle this particular pandemic, who are the hundreds of millions of people who've had our lives turned inside out to begrudge him getting his swerve on? 

I've put up with a lot worse than sheltering in place for two months in order to get another guy laid. This is not much different than my man Neil hanging a sock on the doorknob of the dorm room, signalling that the rest of us need to walk around or find another place to spent the night until he's gotten his nut. So anyone who resents him for making rules that don't apply to him needs to relax and just appreciate that your sacrifice showed these two crazy kids a good time. 

Neil Ferguson: Not so good on the stats. But fantastic on the Staats.