If Your Head Hurts, It May Just Be The Rusty Knife Embedded In It From 26 Years Ago

As someone who suffers from migraines, sometimes it feels like the sharp pain coming from behind my left eye radiating across my forehead is actually an ice blade that the Night King has inserted into my brain during my sleep. Of course, its probably just the Halo Top coupled with stress and dehydration and not in fact an ACTUAL knife. 

But what if it was? 

[Dramatic music]

In 2012, a 72-year-old man went to the doctor's office after he began suffering from a chronic headache.

First of all, that is remarkable on its own. Do you know how hard it is for old people to get up the gumption to seek medical treatment unless their bleeding profusely or on death's door? Given how grizzled this generation is from all kinds of crazy shit, it's damn near impossible for them to get out of their recliner chairs to go to the doctor, even for very serious ailments. 

But the story gets more insane. 

Turns out the headache came from a 4-inch blade that had been embedded in his skull for the last 25 years.

25 years. With a hunk of metal the size of a steak knife. Embedded. In. His. Brain. 



Do you see that photo?? My word.

According to a recent story out of Britain, the four-inch blade had been there since the man was violently mugged in 1994 but was never removed because doctors feared that doing so would put his life in significant danger. 

The alternative to removing the knife was also a fucking pain in the... head. According to the man, he was unable to laugh, yawn, or even cough due to the placement of the blade for the entire 26 years. 

WHAT? We do all of those things pretty much every day. 

‘CT and X-ray scans showed the blade at the base of the patient’s skull, lodged against his eye socket and pressing against his optic nerve.

Chief neurosurgeon Liu Guangcun agreed that removing the knife blade – measuring 4 inches long and 1.2 inches wide – was the ‘only way to resolve the pensioner’s suffering once and for all’.

At the end of March, he was flown more than 1,860 miles for the pro bono treatment after medics touring the countryside discovered his shocking case, which went largely untreated due to the limitations of local medical facilities.

What a miracle. Have you ever heard of anything this insane? I can't get over it. 

Reading this made a lightbulb go off. I am a little whiny BITCH about my aches and pains. With the slightest pulse in my skull, I run to the bathroom for a million Excedrins, get into the fetal position, and spend the day in the dark with an ice pack firmly over my eyes. 

Now that I hear what this guy went through and for how long, I might never complain about a headache ever again. I might turn the lights on even brighter and turn the music on full blast the next time I have one of those "migraines" just to toughen myself up.

Anything's better than living with an ice pick in your skull.