The Barstool Fund - In Support Of The 30 Day FundLearn More

The Marine Corps Continues To Be The Dumbest Branch And This Video Is A Perfect Example of That Dumbness

Most of the country is in a state of lockdown and all the other branches of service has issued relaxed grooming standards or tough social distancing rules. Not my beloved Marine Corps.

Nope. These folks still have to get haircuts every single week. They still have to stand in line to make sure you can see the skin on the side of their heads. Can’t relax standards during a pandemic. After all, they are called standards for a reason and what would become of lethality if Marines had long (3 inches) hair? Our republic would surely collapse, Shirley.

“Don’t call me Shirley, Chaps.”

Sorry. I was fired up.

In reality, I’m not sure what I’d do if I was the Commandant but it wouldn’t be this shit. I’d probably tell everyone to shave their heads like you do at boot camp. Issue a 20 dollar allowance for all Marines so they can buy cheap clippers and then boom. Or one per company. Show up at 5am on Monday and if you’re head if shaved, cool. If not, we’ll give you clippers and you can do it there. Hose off. Run. Work. Problem solved. You no longer have idiotic videos like this one circulating because haircuts are paramount and we’ll take care of that for you.

Beyond stupid but it’s who we are and I kinda love it. I hate it. But I kinda love it because it’s exactly what I’d expect. Anyway, here’s how to make a SUPER effective mask.

The ole Green Covid-infected weenie strikes again.