Hahahahahahaha I am crying laughing as I type this. My living room's the first room you walk into in my house with the couch no less than 5 feet from my wide open front door as I'm simply staring into this dark abyss of rain & 50+ mph winds. All I've heard for the last few hours is my 2 rocking chairs & swing banging against the railings of my porch so once I figured out there was no paranormal activity to blame for the noises I figured I'd check the show out for myself. After a few minutes I've come to the conclusion that any time you can audibly hear wind it is very bad news bears.
As Clem blogged earlier, Mother Nature is up to a lot of no good right now.
Hell...one Michael J. Francesa already lost his power a few hours ago & he's on the North Shore near that Great Neck that says 48 in the above tweet. I'm down on the bottom in that 51 area aka the area with the highest winds in the Tri-State (I'm not counting Bridgeport, Connecticut cause I went to a strip club there once & it was a subpar time). It may only be a matter of time before Helen Hunt & the late Bill Paxton make their way down here.
The gusts I'm witnessing have led me to begin taking precautions in the form of charging anything in this house that can be charged. We're talking laptops, phones, charging cases for said phones, walkie talkies, fleshlights, and more. Need all the power we can get before I inevitably have to go sit in one of my parent's cars & charge my "phone" in there like a peon.
Obviously the quarantine just makes this 100000x worse. Not that I'm some award-winning outdoorsman, but at least if it wasn't in quarantine I could leave the house. Maybe go shoot some hoops? Hangout in the local park with my pals? Go to the mall? Pretty much revert back to being a little smart ass 8th grader wearing Abercrombie & Fitch. You may have noticed I said Abercrombie & Fitch; that's because I had to wear Abercrombie & Fitch in the 8th grade because they were the adult sizes. Sad stuff…I know.
With none of that being possible I can't grasp what activities I would actually be able to do. I figured out a few off the top of my head like attempting to turn my 4-year-old Rottweiler into the world's first frisbee-catching Rottweiler or reading the Shining. Outside of those 2 options I'm stumped and I don't even think you can read a book at night during a power outage right? Unless we're bringing candles into the mix and frankly that's just not happening with something as dark as the Shining. Practically just asking for ghosts.
If you have any ideas should my power go out please DM me on Twitter @glenny_balls. Thank you for your time.