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A Guy Slicing Up Random Objects With A Knife As Onlookers Go Wild Is Sports Now

Like it or not, this is sports now. Personally I like it a lot. All of this time off for the major sports leagues like the NBA, NHL and MLB give other, lesser-known leagues like the Knife Cutting Random Stuff League (KCRSL) a chance to shine. Not that there's anything remotely good about the coronavirus and everyone being quarantine but otherwise we wouldn't know anything about the KCRSL and the people in it. The storylines, the pageantry, the pomp and circumstance would all still be underground. Not anymore. The ESPN Ocho-like leagues have been thrust into the spotlight given our current situation.

My favorite part was when he sliced all those water bottles at once. Getting through all of those in one swipe must be like hitting a grand slam because the crowd went BONKERS when that happened. I think a couple ladies passed out because it made them so horny. It had the same feeling of when Jose Bautista hit that home run in the ALDS and flipped his bat to Mars (I was gonna use Jose Altuve as the example here but we don't tolerate cheaters, not in the MLB, even though they kinda do, and most certainly not in the KCRSL). 

Also I may not know much but I know for a fact that this guy is the Bill Belichick of the KKCRSL

That guy knows every trick in the book. A grizzled veteran who takes no shit and only wants to win. He's even sponsored! What a legend. I hope Will Ferrell makes a movie about the KCRSL.