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Yankees Somewhat Weekly Round-Up

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I woke up this morning to find out that the Yankees are in a Wild Card spot but with Toronto coming to town, we can control a lot of our own destiny. The combo of us playing Toronto and the O’s out in Seattle means that as long as we win, every other result brings us closer to the playoffs. No huge stories to report today so let’s run through a bunch on Yankees news and notes. Real news at the top and jokes at the bottom.

Chase Headley: Love the move. The guy has been hot for the last month and is making immediate contributions while only costing the Yankees $3mil for the rest of the year. Who knows, maybe we keep him after he helps win a World Series this year.

Cliff Lee: Dude is not the answer for the Yankees. I am all for making a run every year, and do think the Yankees can this year, but not with Cliff Lee. If the Yankees were to trade for him, he would be another overpaid antique that is a shell of himself. Let’s also not forget that Lee has a no trade clause and has opted to not be a Yankee in the past, plus his wife hate Yankee fans. Overall if we were 1 guy away from making a run, Lee could be the guy but we are a few pieces away and Lee doesn’t fit in that puzzle.

Other Trades: Last night the Yankees traded for Chris Capuano who has been dogshit for 2 other organizations this off-season but in the end he is probably a non-factor. Cashman is out trying to find an arm and a bat but in the meantime he is making incremental improvements to this roster, incase the big splash isn’t there. So far the minor moves have improved this team and Capuano is just an emergency arm. There is also talk of bringing back Ian Kennedy but a fly ball pitcher in the Bronx will not work out well. Look for a move to get a lefty starter soon.

Tanaka: 10 days into 40 days of rest and things are not looking good. Tanaka is still complaining about arm discomfort and i would not be surprised if we heard word come down soon that Tanaka is shut down for surgery so he could come back for the 2nd half next year.

Pineda: Pineda has been throwing again and has a simulated game today. If all goes well, he will make a rehab start next week and begin his push back to the big leagues. In all likelihood, he will be getting an MRI tomorrow for some setback and I will flip my shit.

Chuck Knoblauch: Arrested for hitting his ex-wife but, if you look at his mugshot he should be arrested for looking like hot dogs smell. Does he think that hitting women is the same as sleeping with them? Like once you bang a girl you can do it again cause she doesn’t want to get her numbers up, but in this case you can just hit them again and again even after your divorce. It doesn’t work that way and the end of probation doesn’t mean you are free and clear to do it again.

Paul O’Neill Bobblehead Day: So Sunday is Paul O’Neill at the stadium and if you follow me on Twitter you know I LOVE O’Neill. Not in a “tummy sticks” way but in a “lets slam beers and break stuff as best friends” way. So I thought about going to the game just for the bobblehead and the beers I would drink, until I found out it’s only for fans 14 and under. I get that its a “toy” and all that shit but anyone 14 and under never saw him play and don’t know the joy of smashed water coolers. I know this is going to sound creepy but where the fuck am I gonna find a kid on such short notice? Update: Turns out it isn’t 14 and under so i don’t need any kids.