I'm Sick And Tired Of People Making Fun Of My Target Plates

It's been a weird few days in my life. I think I'm getting trolled by both my coworkers in Chicago coupled with my coworkers in NYC and paired with the entire internet, but I can't tell why so I'm just choosing to ignore it for now. But ICYMI it's something about how I eat my food wrong or something. 

ANYWAYS - in the midst of getting shit on by people that I can only assume are a bunch of raging libs mad at me for eating meat or something, a lot of people were making fun of the plates that occupy my cupboard as well. 

Look you cocksuckers, you can make fun of me, you can make fun of my family, you can make fun of TheFoodIEatEvenThoughItsPerfectlyConsumable. I don't give a shit about any of that. But don't you DARE make fun of my dinnerware.

Now I know what you're thinking: "But WSD you're an internet blogger thousandaire, you have to have fine China plates and expensive silverware laying around the house, not just plates from Target, right? You can't be THAT much of a common man!"

To which I'd say.... you have a fair point. But you'd also be incorrect.  Here's a picture of the entirety of my dinnerware set:

Not pictured: the one steak knife I own, or my butterknife, fork, spoon, spatula or ladle  

Look, I'm a 31 year old single dude. A lot of yous out there are saying "hey asshole, get some new plates you poor!" I mean it's relentless and if I'm being frank, quite uncouth: 

Blah fucking blah. Look you cocksuckers, I live in alone in a Lincoln Park 1 bed. WHY IN THE FUCK WOULD I HAVE MORE THAN 2 PLATES? I mean anything more than 2 plates is just inefficient and a waste of money for anyone in my position, even someone with as much money as I have. 

Ha! I can totally tell WSD never gets chicks over to his place with those plates! I bet he sleeps on a mattress that sits on a boxspring on the floor too! 

Lol. I crush boxes at a pace that would make Dente blush. And to answer your question, yes, I have a real actual bed.  Just stop shaming me about my goddamn plates. I'm also getting this one a lot:

But WSD if you're gonna use shitty plastic plates why not just use paper plates?

Ha. Good one. What do you think, I'm a poor? Gross. 

Anyways that's all I gotta say about that. 

~fin~