Florida Woman Plays Easter Bunny by Putting Plastic Eggs Stuffed with Porn Into People's Mailboxes

Source - A Florida woman was arrested this week after she tried playing Easter Bunny by placing 400 little plastic Easter Eggs filled with pornographic images and fish-shaped crackers into strangers' mailboxes.

According to a release from the Flagler County Sheriff's Department, Abril Cestoni, 42, was arrested early Thursday morning after deputies received multiple calls about a woman going around their neighborhood placing the porn-filled plastic eggs in their mailboxes. Inside the egg, residents reported finding a cracker in the shape of a fish, one sheet of toilet paper, a powdered drink mix, and a crumpled up piece of paper containing pornographic images.

Thanks to home surveillance video, deputies were able to identify the vehicle Cestoni used while allegedly delivering the eggs and conducted a traffic stop on her vehicle. Druing the investigation, Cestoni admitted to deputies that she'd placed the plastic eggs in people's mailboxes because she was trying to educate people on the need for churches and for pastors to give money to the less fortunate. 

“Abril stated she was ‘a church’ and had a business license. Abril said she was conducting research on local clergy and people deserved to know the truth,” the arrest report stated.

 This is against the law in Flagler County, Florida? Huh. Good to know. I would've guessed it was a tradition there. That eggs stuffed with goldfish crackers and porn were their Cadbury Cremes. That deranged lunatics sticking sex pictures into your mailbox were as much a part of Easter in Flagler as the Pope saying Mass is in Rome or me having to dress up and share ham, scalloped potatoes and passive/aggressiveness with my in laws is in my world. Go figure.

But frankly I don't see the actual crime here. My girl Abril Cestoni is just educating the people about the need for churches and giving to the needy. It's so obviously a religious message I kind of feel like they're violating her rights under the 1st Amendment. The goldfish cracker? That's easy. Jesus made fish out of loaves. The toilet paper? Um ... Easter is a time of renewal, I guess? To clean your soul, maybe. I'm not sure. The drink mix? He turned water into wine. The porn? OK, that's a little problematic. The symbolism on that one is a little more obscure. But maybe she's saying He died for our sins or we need to forgive sinners or even just reminding people to stay home and giving them some porn to enjoy will help faciliate that. I don't know. You'd have to ask her.

What I do know is the message that we need churches and to give money to the less fortunate is a good one. Something we all need to be reminded of now and again. So don't hate the message or the messenger. Let's all hope there are more Abril's out there spreading the word that we need to do more. And that they still publish porn magazines for some reason. Good to know.